Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Making Impossible My New Favorite Word

I am at the home stretch of my weight loss phase. The word that keeps coming up in my head is... RESOLVE. I can do this. I can make goal. I will make goal. Even the other day I caught myself saying to Redwing "If I reach goal," I quickly corrected myself and said, "When I reach goal." This last step of the weight loss phase is as much mental as it is physical.

After work I went to spend some time with the boys I nanny. I am pretty good friends with their mom, and I wanted to spend some time catching up over dinner. After dinner, she wanted to show me the dresses she was wearing to Derby and Oaks. I have always considered this woman to be such an amazing example of health. I looked at her dresses and one was a size Large and the other was a size 12. This was such a WOW moment for me. I can wear size 14 "fitted" dresses now, and they look very nice on me. Regardless of the messages I keep telling myself, my body is indeed getting smaller. Even if I cannot physically see it, something registers when I hold something up that has been on my body, and I am amazed that it actually fit on ME. I so want to be like the kid on Home Alone who shouts, "I'm not afraid anymore." Except I will be shouting, "I'm not fat anymore!"

I bought a "worry" ring today...one that you can turn round and round while you are wearing it. I recall when I graduated from college getting a size 13 graduation ring. Today, on that same finger, I could wear a size 8 ring! :) How cool is that?

I am calling on Thursday about joining a recreational sand volleyball league for the next eight weeks starting in May. It is only one night a week, but I really think I would like to do it. This is so bizarre, me wanting to be on a sports team. A year ago there is no way I could have done that physically. I think I will still have a few issues as far as probably being the biggest girl on the team, but at least I am out there giving it a shot.

No comments: