My PCP wants me to stop the weight loss. I have lost 11 pounds on her scale since I saw her last. I explained to her how I was eating, so she couldn't agrue with me on that point. I have personally decided that I am going to creatively disagree with her on this point. I want to get to the mid range of a normal BMI for certain.
I think one issue that my PCP (and many PCPs may have) is that our society is so big now. When a person my size comes in, I appear to be normal, or even "small." I have also stated earlier that she is on the bigger side herself (not really big, but a bit chunky), and I think perhaps when she sizes me up to herself she thinks I don't need to lose any weight.
Ben came to see my classroom today. He was very complimentary on how it looked. I got to introduce him to a few coworkers as well. Then we went to pick up his mom from the airport and have dinner together. She was a very sweet lady, and we got along very well. Tomorrow we are going for brunch together.
I am off to bed. I want a FULL night's sleep tonight.
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Good Morning
I weighed in at 160 this morning. I am down one pound so far this month. I typically lose the most around my period, so I am still hoping for more of a loss to show later on this month. I am one pound away from a NORMAL BMI! Woooo Hooooo!!!
Today I am going to see my PCP, and proably get some labs done. I am working at school this morning, and this afternoon I am taking Ben down to see my classroom, and meet some of the people I work with. Then, we are picking up his mom from the airport, and going to dinner. She really seems to like me, I hope this carries through when we spend time together this afternoon and evening.
On Sunday evening while waiting for the crew to get our hot air balloon ready, Ben and I were on the sidelines watching. He decided to sit down, and asked if I was going to do so as well. I said no, because of bugs. (I seem to attract all types of bugs, and end up with a million bug bites. After going to two outdoor dramas this weekend, I didn't want to be closer to any of them that I had to.) He said well you can sit here, and patted his legs. I politely declined. In my head I couldn't believe he would actually think I am light enough to sit on his lap.
Yesterday, I was talking with a woman who used to be my co-worker. She asked if I was ready to stop with my weight loss. I said no, because I still have pockets of fat that I can grab. She said I have that (she is pretty small), and that most people have that. I realize this is true, but I really want to be at the lower end of my BMI range. I want to have some cushion in case I bounce back a few pounds a year or so from now.
Today I am going to see my PCP, and proably get some labs done. I am working at school this morning, and this afternoon I am taking Ben down to see my classroom, and meet some of the people I work with. Then, we are picking up his mom from the airport, and going to dinner. She really seems to like me, I hope this carries through when we spend time together this afternoon and evening.
On Sunday evening while waiting for the crew to get our hot air balloon ready, Ben and I were on the sidelines watching. He decided to sit down, and asked if I was going to do so as well. I said no, because of bugs. (I seem to attract all types of bugs, and end up with a million bug bites. After going to two outdoor dramas this weekend, I didn't want to be closer to any of them that I had to.) He said well you can sit here, and patted his legs. I politely declined. In my head I couldn't believe he would actually think I am light enough to sit on his lap.
Yesterday, I was talking with a woman who used to be my co-worker. She asked if I was ready to stop with my weight loss. I said no, because I still have pockets of fat that I can grab. She said I have that (she is pretty small), and that most people have that. I realize this is true, but I really want to be at the lower end of my BMI range. I want to have some cushion in case I bounce back a few pounds a year or so from now.
Monday, August 4, 2008
Before the Breakthru....
As I have lost weight since having the DS, I've noticed that there always seems to be quite a bit of resistance from your body before a breakthru. Some examples for me were: getting below the 300 pound mark, 100 pounds lost, and you all remember my frustration with wanting to reach ONEderland!
I am at that place again. I am TWO pounds from a normal BMI. My body has been parked for a little over a week and a half here. This time I know that I will breakthru, I just have no clue WHEN I will do so. I know in the past eating more has helped me, so I could certainly try that.
I am off to go work in my classroom, then I will be going to the GED center this evening. I am so thrilled that school will be starting in just a few days!
I am at that place again. I am TWO pounds from a normal BMI. My body has been parked for a little over a week and a half here. This time I know that I will breakthru, I just have no clue WHEN I will do so. I know in the past eating more has helped me, so I could certainly try that.
I am off to go work in my classroom, then I will be going to the GED center this evening. I am so thrilled that school will be starting in just a few days!
Accomplished Another Goal
Last night Ben and I went on a hot air balloon ride. We went on one with just the pilot and the two of us. It was gorgeous! It was very romantic too.
Ben took my picture up in the air:
Ben took my picture up in the air:
This summer I was able to go skydiving, riding in a hot air balloon, and horseback riding. The only thing I didn't accomplish was white water rafting. There is still a few more weeks left that I could possibly do that, but I will certainly get it done next summer at the very latest.
Sunday, August 3, 2008
I am a size what???
I had said at the beginning of the summer that I was going to try to focus less on what I actually weigh, and more on going down a size. Well, I wish I could say that I had focused less on my weight (I still obsess over the scale)! My goal was to be able to wear a size 10 pair of dress pants by August 12th (the first day of school).
I can wear a size 8 dress pants!!! Talk about doing a happy jig in the dressing room. It is so strange how your body always shrinks even when the scale isn't budging. I also bought TWO size small skirts!!! (They are the looser fitting type.)
I held up the pants, and could not believe that my entire body fit into them. I am still in awe of the fact that I am really not as big as I think in my head. Putting on these pants made it tangible.
I bought a pair of size 10 jeans, and they fit very nicely. (I have noticed that I will go down a size in dress pants before I go down a size in jeans.) I was asking the lady at the checkout counter if she felt these jeans ran true to size (since we have so much vanity sizing these days), and she said yes. She said, "I'm an eight." Then proceeds to hold the jeans up to her, and says they look very true to size. (I am also thinking in my head that there is no way I am just one size bigger than her. Why can't I see what is actually there?)
This is the first year of teaching that I will start out as a non-obese person. It thrills me.
I can wear a size 8 dress pants!!! Talk about doing a happy jig in the dressing room. It is so strange how your body always shrinks even when the scale isn't budging. I also bought TWO size small skirts!!! (They are the looser fitting type.)
I held up the pants, and could not believe that my entire body fit into them. I am still in awe of the fact that I am really not as big as I think in my head. Putting on these pants made it tangible.
I bought a pair of size 10 jeans, and they fit very nicely. (I have noticed that I will go down a size in dress pants before I go down a size in jeans.) I was asking the lady at the checkout counter if she felt these jeans ran true to size (since we have so much vanity sizing these days), and she said yes. She said, "I'm an eight." Then proceeds to hold the jeans up to her, and says they look very true to size. (I am also thinking in my head that there is no way I am just one size bigger than her. Why can't I see what is actually there?)
This is the first year of teaching that I will start out as a non-obese person. It thrills me.
Saturday, August 2, 2008
ZUMBA Class ROCKS!!!
I went to ZUMBA class, and I LOVED IT!!! I did Jazzercise many years ago, and really enjoyed it. This takes Jazzercise to a whole different level. It was really fun, and the time passed by super quickly. I am going to start taking the classes on Saturdays, and possibly some Sundays. Wooo Hooo!!!
Happy Saturday
I had a wonderful evening last night with Ben. We went to a cookout at a church member's house. Then we went to see The Wiz at an outdoor amphitheater. It was really good!
Afterwards we came back to my house to start discussing the book we started reading together, Love and Respect. We also started 101 Questions to Ask Before Getting Engaged. I told him how hard it was for me to open up to people. I take a really long time to form deep friendships. For example, I worked at a school for five and a half years, and I had three really close friends. While I was nice to everyone, I would only tell personal things to those three people. He has commented that I make friends so easily in new settings. What I keep forgetting to tell him is that if you listen in on the conversation, 95% of it will be me asking questions about the other person's interests, etc. I only tell very general things about myself. This man is worth the investment of getting to know (and in turn me revealing personal things about myself), and I'm going to work on being more open about big questions.
Time to go to ZUMBA class. I can't wait to report back on how I like it. I really hope it lives up to the hype that I've heard about it.
Afterwards we came back to my house to start discussing the book we started reading together, Love and Respect. We also started 101 Questions to Ask Before Getting Engaged. I told him how hard it was for me to open up to people. I take a really long time to form deep friendships. For example, I worked at a school for five and a half years, and I had three really close friends. While I was nice to everyone, I would only tell personal things to those three people. He has commented that I make friends so easily in new settings. What I keep forgetting to tell him is that if you listen in on the conversation, 95% of it will be me asking questions about the other person's interests, etc. I only tell very general things about myself. This man is worth the investment of getting to know (and in turn me revealing personal things about myself), and I'm going to work on being more open about big questions.
Time to go to ZUMBA class. I can't wait to report back on how I like it. I really hope it lives up to the hype that I've heard about it.
Friday, August 1, 2008
Dentist Update
I went to the dentist, and did not have to have a root canal. I am still not out of the woods yet. I have another tooth next week she is going to work on, and there is a possibility of a root canal on that one. Which brings me to the subject of crowns...I will be needing 3-4 of them. I am going to get one over Christmas break, one over Spring Break, one at the start of summer, etc. I was happy to find out that just because you need a crown does not mean you need a root canal. :) I thought they came together as a package. I could of course wait it out until I desperately need the crowns, but then that means I will have to have another summer of dental torture. Quite frankly, I am still recovering from the summer of 2006 dental torture.
My dentist and her assistant, Mary, were talking about how great I looked. I told them both that I wanted to lose another 15 pounds. The both said that I didn't need to lose anymore weight. I still have several places with good size pockets of fat. I think there is some shock value when people who have known me look at me. They see where I came from and think wow she looks great. While that is wonderful, I still want to get into the middle range of a healthy BMI.
I am stocking up on protein bars, etc at netrition.com. The school year is getting ready to start, and I want a lot of quick and easy products easily at my disposal.
My dentist and her assistant, Mary, were talking about how great I looked. I told them both that I wanted to lose another 15 pounds. The both said that I didn't need to lose anymore weight. I still have several places with good size pockets of fat. I think there is some shock value when people who have known me look at me. They see where I came from and think wow she looks great. While that is wonderful, I still want to get into the middle range of a healthy BMI.
I am stocking up on protein bars, etc at netrition.com. The school year is getting ready to start, and I want a lot of quick and easy products easily at my disposal.
Another Closet Purge
I have two more huge stacks of clothing for Goodwill. I still need to go sort through the t-shirts, etc that I have in my drawers, but wow these closet purges feel good. I still had a few clothes that were 22/24. This time it was weird getting rid of 16s, 14s, and even 12s. I even got rid of a lot of large skirts.
I know it will take work, but I am more confident than ever that I can maintain this weight loss for life. I need to stay diligent, but it can happen.
Off to the dentist. Oh happy days...
I know it will take work, but I am more confident than ever that I can maintain this weight loss for life. I need to stay diligent, but it can happen.
Off to the dentist. Oh happy days...
Dentist
Today I get to go in for an hour and twenty minute appointment to the dentist. OH JOY! The best part is she doesn't know how bad it is going to be until she gets in there, because she cannot tell for certain from the x-ray. I have a feeling this is going to be one of SEVERAL dentist appointments. On a much more positive note, Ben insisted on taking me to the dentist. :) He is such a sweetheart.
I forgot to mention one thing last weekend that sent me into a complete and utter panic. Ben was holding me, and went to lift me off my feet. My body immediately was trasported back into a 393 pound woman. I locked up all my muscles, and didn't let him. I want to be at a weight where a guy could pick me up, but I am by no means there yet. I wonder if in my mind I will ever be there.
Last night at the nursing home, Ben and I visited a lady in her fifties who was SSMO. It was so difficult for me, thinking that I could have been her. (Also thinking that at the rate I was headed, I could have been her in my forties.) My heart broke for her. She couldn't walk at all when she came in. Now she can walk extremely short distances. She cannot sleep flat, because of airway restriction. Seeing this made me even more determined to get these last few pounds off, and try to maintain a healthy weight.
Yesterday on three different occassions Ben mentioned that he could tell I was losing weight. He said I had a very slender waist. Never would I have expected to hear those words from a guy. WOW! Interestingly enough, while he has been saying all these sweet comments, the scale won't budge.
I forgot to mention one thing last weekend that sent me into a complete and utter panic. Ben was holding me, and went to lift me off my feet. My body immediately was trasported back into a 393 pound woman. I locked up all my muscles, and didn't let him. I want to be at a weight where a guy could pick me up, but I am by no means there yet. I wonder if in my mind I will ever be there.
Last night at the nursing home, Ben and I visited a lady in her fifties who was SSMO. It was so difficult for me, thinking that I could have been her. (Also thinking that at the rate I was headed, I could have been her in my forties.) My heart broke for her. She couldn't walk at all when she came in. Now she can walk extremely short distances. She cannot sleep flat, because of airway restriction. Seeing this made me even more determined to get these last few pounds off, and try to maintain a healthy weight.
Yesterday on three different occassions Ben mentioned that he could tell I was losing weight. He said I had a very slender waist. Never would I have expected to hear those words from a guy. WOW! Interestingly enough, while he has been saying all these sweet comments, the scale won't budge.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)